Man Like You

Good morning! There was a short period yesterday in which I found myself sitting on the couch with the song Man Like You by Tom Misch on repeat for almost an hour. One thing that kept coming to mind as I listened were the ideas of expectations and being enough.

I can say that I know who I am because I have gone through both hardships and victories; shaping the person I am today. But this doesn't stop me from periodically asking the classic question, 

Am I enough? 

It's so easy to get lost in the doubt and the fear that tries so hard to invade our thoughts. Leaving behind a sense of regret and disappointment when things don't happen the way we want them to. 

Sometimes, I see what I want to see and not necessarily what is actually happening. I tend to blow things out of proportion and unknowingly build high expectations which has - to be honest with you, gotten me hurt more times than I can remember. The pain of realizing that it was all a ruse and that not everything was how it seemed. Thinking and believing that things would somehow be different this time but ending up disappointed all the same. Heartbreak from myself and from others has sculpted the fool of a man that writes before you today. Words that narrate the feelings I can find no other way to express but through these posts that only like 5 or 6 people read. (Thank you)

I am trying my best to simply understand that growth is necessary; and with growth comes sacrifice of comfort that is essential to becoming a man I am proud to be. With the way I have handled myself and my tasks lately, it is definitely a work in progress. 

However I am comforted in knowing that people are around me who inspire me to become better. To be more loving, more kind, more patient and more appreciative of the things that I fail to see. There's so much more of life to be lived and joy to be experienced. One bad day or five sleepless nights won't change that. And when the clock hits midnight, a new day has already begun. 

But trust me when I tell you that every sunrise brings about another opportunity to love, to hurt, to live. Every sunset is a chance to recognize the man or the woman you are and be grateful for it. Because you are still here aren't you? Don't let overthinking and the fear of disappointment change that. Everything has its time and place but bring your best self regardless.

You did not make it this far just to make it this far. 

There's something underneath the surface, someone amidst the crowd of faces, a diamond hidden in the rough and it is you. 

I knew a boy who was swallowed by the sky
By the flashing lights
I knew a man who got lost in the big dark blue
And he came out alive
I knew a boy, I knew a man that looked a lot like you

AMDG